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Saturday, November 17, 2012

Relationships disquised as relations

Hey Mars,

     We are all grown women right? Well into our forties, some late thirties, but we should have learned by now what constitutes and how to apply the components of a true relationship. If you've lived through some relationships be it with friends, family and/or especially a man, then you should be able to relate to this weeks blog.
     One thing we can agree on, if we'll allow a bit of transparency, is that in our best relationships we had everything from soup to nuts. He was attentive, passionate, resourceful and full of bright ideas. You met each others family, spent all holidays together (there was never a question) and we exchanged gifts too. He better had made absolutely sure to get that gift, that you knew he knew what it was, right?! Funny, we seemed to know all about each other but when we disagreed you would have thought it was the end of the world. I remember, losing all of my appetite behind that thing call love and when it goes wrong. Wow, but one thing was for sure, he was yours and you were his.
     Nowadays, and if your not married but I've heard some marital horror stories, true relationships are a thing of the past. Now, if you've lived a little on the wild side, you had a "relation" or two that was quite nontraditional. All his attention, passion and resources were used for the soul purpose of releasing his inhibitions. Perhaps, that was your role ladies, you were using him for all of the above, especially his resources aka money. Don't try to act like you never tried to get a man to pay your way, for everything especially for the very expensive items, that in the backs of our mind, he ought to pay, right! This would all apply if he had a good job and wasn't cheap. But this all came at a price, because if your not already having "relations" with him (remember Granny Klumps) then everything he does is contingent upon again somebodies inhibitions being released.
     Mars, lets be honest, because there are some men out here who love to lavish women and he has hidden agendas, such as possession. You belong to him, why because you are wearing his ring, spent his money, had relations, perhaps his child or children, all in the name of love. Meanwhile, you are dealing with other demons like anger, yelling and name calling.
     This is not in the true sense of having a relationship, the latter can and has gotten real messy. So let's pick up on the next level of topic next time...we will discuss Soul tides (healthy and unhealthy) which could lead to places beyond our imagination. Let's practice true relationships, you might have to go back into your past and be honest with you. Though this process might hurt now, this too shall past. Remember, weeping may endure for a night but JOY comes in the morning...

Until then...
Jerri of Mars