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Thursday, December 2, 2010

The Insignificant Other

The insignificant other in most cases is the father or perhaps the "absent" one. Are there times when you think about him? Whether in a good way or bad but the title of this post is relevant. In most of MARS cases  this person is insignificant because he has not made himself available. This is very hard to comprehend in the beginning stages of mothering alone but through time it should and will get better, if you allow the opportunity. Please single mothers don't you become unavailable, it's about our son or sons. Use this time to mold your child into someone significant and available which leads down the road of greatness. 
The dictionary defines insignificant as lacking power, position or value; worthy of little praise. So, let us take back our power because Power belongs to God and He has given it to us. You're going to need all the power and strength to be successful at raising your son(s). I would be in error to inform you that there will be countless times of weakness, so know that you do have power, just find it and utilize it. Our position has been handed to us and there's no other. You are Mother! He is Son! and the two of you together can conquer all things. Never forget that you are MORE than conquerors. Contrary to belief, you are valuable; to yourself and your son(s). He sets his eyes upon you daily to make sound decisions, his food, clean house and his clothes. He needs you to be mom, friend, funny, structured, and his first love. But you must feel valuable, so love yourself. Start this by buying yourself something nice, get with a good friend and have a "makeover day". You can make a meal and invite yourself. Also make time, in your day, to have at least dinner together with your son(s). This is a good opportunity to talk about your day. Lastly, give yourself and him some praise. You will be surprised how far a smile or the words, "you are smart son", "Mommy loves you", or "I'm proud of you", will go. Words of praise are powerful and worthy. Remember life and death is in the power of the tongue, so speak life to your son but first speak life to YOURSELF! 
I wrote this today to remind myself that I am not insignificant. After 20 years of single mothering, I was feeling this way earlier this evening. But taking all this into account, I had to check myself. I am significant, I am loved and truly admired by who? My son while the list goes on...
Sincerely, Jerri of MARS